All relationships are PERFECT

(Where do I get this stuff? 😉

Each situation I experience with another person is the perfect and necessary one for my evolution.

Because of this, it is important that I do not cling to negative emotions such as anguish, depression, frustration or anger and than I try to see it at every moment as what life wants to teach me.

Each person I know has a message for me and until I listen to it, it is highly probable (trust me! 😉 ) that it will be repeated.

In every situation, repeat to myself:
Everything is perfect.
In time, it will be crystal clear.

So that piece was paraphrased from some numerology or astrology thing which I excavated in my clearing process today, what a cool discovery! Great magic, great synchronicity!

A former therapist of mine had done this super-in-depth astro-workup on me and it’s actually really fascinating and really spot on although I’m at the same time thrilled to find that my own notes from that time are sooo very OFF … what I was looking for in a relationship sounds like some silly fairy tale  and my feelings were exaggerated and immature … BOY have I come a LONG way, DAMN! I would’a been a nightmare to have a relationship with, how come guys always said I was the best girlfriend they ever had? I had some pretty unhealthy patterns goin’ on there!

So nice and so great to breathe in the major difference I feel now. Thank you god, thank you universe!

So here is the modern-day piece:

What-If Scenarios

If I do pull a what-if, I do it out of self-protection. As a general rule, I am not a what-iffer. I do not believe in what-iffing, unless it’s what-if-UPping … “What if I go to work today and everybody loves me?”  That’s an example of some nice what-if-upping! 🙂

Nevertheless, there are occasions when I pull a fast one and take to what-iffing. I have been doing it a bunch lately, to my dismay. I need to keep redirecting myself.

Scenario A :: Worst-Case
“What if the guy I’m dating is looking for somebody else to hook up with on match.com? I need to know that and to protect myself” is the theoretical concept here.

Scenario B :: Pre-Approval
“I just want you to know that when we go to California, if I’m sick, I may want to lie down.” This is when I want someone to be prepared for a possible scenario, again to protect myself. In this scenario, the what-if that I’ve warned them about often doesn’t even occur. I may go, feel sick and then just suck it up and have fun anyway and the person wouldn’t even have known it. But I want them to understand that the possibility exists so they know what may happen and not get upset if it does happen. I want them to accept me, either way. To get pre-approval.

I need to find ways to make myself feel safe.

Ask myself:

  • Is this coming from fear or is this a legitimate thing that’s happening? (Can I really know that it’s true?)
  • What are the odds that it will happen?

Do what I can to “pick off” assumptions, like in a tin-can alley (is that what you call those things where you shoot the tin targets?)

  • Replace the thought with a new one.
  • Body work: deep breath, notice feet on floor, reach up … anything to interrupt the pattern.
  • Get busy doing.

This one is a work in progress so I’ll keep you updated as I discover new and wondrous ways for Col to make herself feel s a f e !

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~ by gigablonde on September 22, 2007.

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